Beholders Beholding Beholdering

Did a quick painting tonight of everyone’s favorite D&D monster. Don’t know if I’m finished with it or not, but I’m mostly pleased with it thus far.

Taking Over the World With Cleverbot

I’ve always loved chatbots. I don’t know why they fascinate me so. AI is a fascinating subject, and I’m always interested to see how right and usually how wrong chatbots get it.

Cleverbot is supposedly one of the best, and honestly, if this is our best, we have a long way to go until we get to Skynet.

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18:22:39
User:
Who was the winner of the 2010 Mechanical Intelligence Competition?

18:22:42
Cleverbot:
George Washington, everyone knows that.

Inking Miss Samus Aran

Excited how my video game fanart project is going. I’m really happy with how Samus is going to turn out. Check out my portfolio website in a day or so to see how she looks finished up.

Here’s the original sketch for Samus I did several months ago, never before shared with the internets. You can check my twitter to see the final version or simply subscribe to my Portfolio RSS to see it if I finish it by tomorrow.

The Drink and Draw Poster: Inking done!

Yes, it’s glorious. I’ve finally finished the inking for the Drink and Draw Poster. Here’s a tour of the final drawing.

Drink and Draw Poster Progress

More sketching and digital inking on this poster for the Tampa Bay Drink and Draw Social Club. It’s been a lot of fun to work on so far.

I think I still need to add more details, objects, and fun stuff, but it’s more or less shaped up the way I had wanted. I’ll be turning these into positives and making three color screenprints before too terribly long, as well.

“Y’all” Typography of Southern Life Sketch

Here’s an idea that’s been beating around in my brainbox for a while. I had the idea of combining typography with illustration to create an image recording the more saccharine, romantic ideas I have about the place I grew up.

This is just a sketch, and only an hour or so worth of work, but I’m pretty happy with what I’ve got going on so far, a lot of which will probably make it through to the final print version, which will end up as screen printed posters, very inspired by Mondotees.com and their amazingly gorgeous prints. Looking forward to really spending some hours in the shop working this one out.

Voldemort Vector Inks (Harry Potter)

I think Voldemort needs a little more work, maybe some color, but otherwise, I think he’s coming along. We’ll see where the Dark Lord takes us as I work more into this.

Voldemort Sketch (Harry Potter)

So I wanted to draw Voldemort and now I have. Just a sketch, thinking about inking it up in Illustrator. I think ol’ Voldy will look right at home with some Kirby Crackles. I’m looking forward to adding some EC comics style detail to the face and hands, in particular.

Vector Inks on Gordon Freeman Fanart

Quick tease on an illustration, itself only a piece of a large character collage I’m doing. If I can stay motivated, expect to see more of ol’ Gordy soon!

Image Search for Scott Pilgrim Wallpaper

Guess who has two thumbs, speaks limited French, and is on the first page of results for “Scott Pilgrim Wallpaper?” That’s right, c’est moi.

And because I’m a sad, silly nerd, I’m blogging about it in excitement. I probably won’t be on that page of results forever, but it’s a nice thrill.

You can download “Scott Pilgrim vs Dragonball” as a wallpaper appropriate size of 2560 x 1600. As an added bonus, it’s in authentic NES colors!

The NSFW Coloring Book for Kids

Looking through the analytics for my portfolio, I happened to find this great website linking to me. Educational fun for your kids!

Besides goofy misspellings, this website was rich with scraper-riffic content. They had obviously just populated their website with a bunch of stolen artwork brought to them by scripts, with zero thought put into any aspect of this website.

I’m not sure what these scrapers intend to do, giving away my nude artwork for kids to color with crayons. But, I say, hey, why not live and let live. Kids like nude pinup art, right?

Here’s a link to the original artwork, for any of you adults that want to print it out for your toddlers to color.

Geek Girl Drawing | Geek Girl Vector Artwork

The Weirdest Place on Earth

When I visited home during my Christmas break, I had the surreal pleasure of happening on a Junk shop that was, on first glance, completely empty. It was a surreal experience and one that I cannot quite describe. Keep reading for a long post of weird, weird, weird weirdness.

There was, naturally, wall to wall junk. But there was something odd about the place—quiet and abandoned, and full of one surreal object after another. It seemed like there wasn’t a soul around anywhere.

Things started out quaint, perhaps kooky.

Started to raise an eyebrow when I saw things like this. There’s no way that’s a stock photograph. Who sells a picture of somebody else’s kid?

This store quickly became a place of my most horrible nightmares.

A little bit of this might be considered “cute.” Walls and walls of them are bizarre and alarming.

Art direction by Buffalo Bill. “It puts the lotion on its skin…”

Stare upon the face of TRUE pedobear.

Um.

Right.

There were also rows of porcelain figurines across from the mugs, I think. No idea what all this was supposed to be.

“I want to hire a woman I can rape.” They didn’t have that cutesy cartoon mug, but this was close.

That says “Tomato Ketchup Mix.” That’s odd enough. Do you see what’s below it?

Yeah, those are rows of adult diapers. And right next to them?

Gravy and Hollandaise sauce mix.

Seriously, within one meter of each other.

The nostalgia of seeing Fla-Vor-Aid didn’t reassure me I wasn’t going to get murdered.

Rows and rows of empty glass soda bottles. There’s no Nuka-Cola.

Muppets glassware in the same aisle.

And then there was Christmas junk.

Stumped? It used to spell “NOEL.”

How many corpses were packed up in the back like this? NRFB.

Classic Pepsi logo on an ugly racing trucker hat.

This bust was one of my favorite things in here. But really, what?

Almost no rhyme or reason to any of this.

Like I said, no explanation can really describe this place. And I’ve seen loads and loads of junk shops.

And then we got to this back room. This store clearly used to be a grocery store. My heart sank when I saw this room that CLEARLY used to be a cooler and meat department.

How many hundreds of people have met their end at this horrible, rusty slicing equipment?

Shudder.

Is this even a piece of meat cutting equipment? I’m not sure.

Back to the junk. We’ll return to the “off limits” room later.

There’s no good reason for any of this stuff to be there.

Back at the horrible meat locker—some odds and ends. A Cash register…

A scale…

A coffee maker…

And “Fun Capital of the World.”

There might have been six of these grocery carts, all full of this garbage.

Pepsi bottles, full, sealed, and covered with dust.

Dusty piano, seemingly undisturbed until I opened it.

And as if things couldn’t get any more surreal… wait for it…

Yes, that’s right. A cat with one eye. Just hanging out. Being a cat. With ONE EYE.

One. Count ‘em. ONE! This cat was actually very sweet, but I wasn’t going to hang out for much longer after this point.

“Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.”

And for some reason, this sports car (a Mustang?) was inexplicably parked outside. Every bit of this is incredibly incongruous.

Well, I bested the somewhat adorable cyclops and escaped with my life. I seriously hope these people don’t track me down and murder my entire family, because I have been having nightmares of that very thing happening.

I feel very lucky I didn’t end up in the meat locker chopped up into bacon strips.

There was a fun element to this trip. It was sort of like entering a huge area in Fallout 3 or something—some bombed out and dead place that tells a story of people that (hopefully) aren’t around anymore. Everything there—all that junk—told some sort of story. I’m just not quite sure what that story was.

But, I digress. If I ever disappear, please come to this place and rescue me.